So I did it.. I took myself off of the dating apps. They’re gone, deleted, finished! The months of November and December I had been on some pretty bad dates, bad enough I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to write them out. But I figured why the hell not? We all have bad dates, I’m sure as shit not perfect, so I needed to share with you why I quit dating. I mean sure it was partly for a guy, but it mainly due to the fact that it was getting out of hand. I had a different date almost every other night, with some guys from my past, others from dating apps and I was still trying to work a Holiday schedule and see my friends and family. I was burning myself out before I could even find a flame.
In November I had a date with a cop.. The whole thing was beyond weird to me and I should have used that and ran away with it, but against my better judgement I pushed forward. I met the guy on Match, he seemed sweet, had a couple beagles and was hard working. He checked a lot of boxes on my checklist. I didn’t realize after we started talking he lived outside of a 50 miles radius from me, this being Matches fault for their little flaws in the programming. We agreed to a date and he offered to meet me halfway. Unfortunately, his halfway was over an hours drive for me in a little town I was completely unfamiliar with. The only time we really spoke was him picking a day to meet and he ended the conversation with I will see you next week. That was it?! I’d never had a guy not want to continue the conversation through a text. I assumed he was worried we would run out of first date steam, but damn like shot down before it even started. I got all gussied up and headed to my little destination po-dunk town. He called me when I was almost there to let me know he would be a minute or two late which I greatly appreciate, since I am beyond fearful of being stood up. As I pull in I realize that the place is a lot smaller of a pub than I realized. I walk up to the door and see a guy jogging across the street over to me, realizing he was bald I was like umm is this Sirens? He looked a lot more wild eyed in person than his photos, but photos are so deceiving anymore as well as he had shaved his head for work. I don’t mind a bald guy, but it’s definitely not a preference. Throughout the night he would tell beyond animated stories and I would find myself getting bored. At one point I looked at my watch to sadly realize only half an hour had passed. One of the servers would try to tell me how cute my shirt was or ask if I wanted anything and he would always turn to talk to them, thinking they were asking him. I knew he was beyond nervous, but after an hour I was running out of things to talk about. We went through the motions of how he got into being a cop, is he close with family, am I etc.. It was just so vanilla I was losing my mind. He decided he didn’t want to sit in the Pub anymore and we should walk the street. Well Reader’s it was a tiny town with sidewalks and we were in the center of town. It was dark, thirty degrees and an unfamiliar location to both of us. We walked for ten minutes and then decided to proceed to sit in his truck to talk. I kept hoping I could find a way to gently end the date, but I finally said I was tired and had a long walk back. He told me he wanted to kiss me goodnight and I said ok. The kiss was just ok.. The entire night was just bland. I headed home at 8:30 realizing I had to take off my makeup that I worked so hard on..for a boring date. Needless to say I was discouraged..
The second bad date I will give you the one sentence that will make you say Girl NO! He apparently lived further than I had realized, but offered to drive out my way since he really wanted to meet me. When he called me to tell me he was running late, yes another late person but hey he had an hour drive, he said “Hey Jessica….” I said “You mean Kaitlyn?” He said “What.” My response was nothing what’s up. He said I’m running late I will see you soon. I said alright and hung up.. realizing I was already at the restaurant with forty minutes to kill since I left work early. I was already relatively discouraged and the date hadn’t even started. I shook it off when he arrived and noticed he looked nothing like his photo, and not in a good way.. Strike another one for me. The date went ok but there wasn’t much to talk about and he wanted some of my opinions with work.. Like he asked me about my work and how I can help him.. Strike 3 it was weird. I could not wait to go home and put on my jammies.
That night I got home and realized another night of my favorite makeup and perfume wasted. I was sad and disappointed and just defeated. I sat down and realized I am done putting myself through this kind of torture. The best surprises in life are when you are least expecting them, so I decided to stop looking for my flame and just live my life..
Reader’s it’s actually gotten me pretty far
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